Relationship Counseling

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Do You Feel Lost In Your Relationships?

Do you feel lonely in your romantic relationship? Does your marriage feel empty, as though it lacks a true connection? Perhaps you feel like you’ve been working too hard on your relationship only to be left dissatisfied and discouraged. You may feel like your marriage or partnership is stuck in a rut that you just can’t get out of, and that no matter how often you try to express your needs, you just can’t get through to your partner.

You may be struggling with other relationships in your life, including those with your family members. Perhaps you’re a parent who doesn’t know how to connect with your adult child in this new stage of life. Do you feel rejected by your child because they don’t seem as interested in connecting anymore? Do you feel like they just won’t make time for you in their schedule, so you just give up? Or, you’re an adult child who still seeks your parents’ attention and approval, but no matter what you try you never seem to get that need met.

Alternately, you might be trying to create new relationships after a recovery or detox program. You may have grown up with a parent’s addiction or mental health issues, or, perhaps you are currently married to a partner whose life has been touched by addiction.  You may feel like no matter what sort of relationship you’re in, you feel alone because of your history with addiction. Do you feel like you’re continuing the same relationship patterns and you just can’t find a way to change and make amends for the past? Or, have you never learned how to create healthy relationships, and now you wonder if they are even possible for you?

Regardless of your particular relationship issues, do you just want to be heard, seen and accepted by the people in your life?

Many People Feel Unseen And Unappreciated In Their Relationships

Many people struggle with building healthy relationships. In partnerships or marriages, it’s common to feel disconnected for a period of time, even if your relationship used to be strong. Especially when work responsibilities take up so much of your time, it’s easy to feel like everything is a crisis and push your relationship to the side. A busy schedule makes it easy to fall into the routine of “reporting” to your partner everyday, rather than truly connecting. This often leads to loneliness and feeling a lack of love from your partner.

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As a parent with an adult child, you may be struggling to come to terms with your child’s new life, especially if you feel like they don’t have time for you anymore. Many parents also struggle to think of their child as an adult because they’ve raised them since infancy. Now that your child is on their own and maybe setting boundaries in your relationship, or making choices you don’t agree with, it’s normal to feel lost and questions what your purpose is.

Those who are recovering from addiction often find it difficult to throw themselves back in to their lives. Even after a recovery or detox program has offered you greater freedom and control over your life, breaking patterns in relationships may seem overwhelming or impossible. Still, you might know you have to make a change to heal bonds and avoid relapse.

Some people seem to interact so naturally and easily, but for you it’s confusing or exhausting because it’s so much work. It feels like everyone else got a handbook on how to “do relationships” and you didn’t—you feel lost.

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There are several common reasons people struggle to build healthy relationships. Regardless of your particular situation, you—like so many others—may lack positive relationship role models in your life. So, you may grasp onto the sort of relationships that you were exposed to during childhood, making it almost impossible to create healthy adult relationships today. But, no matter how lost you may feel, know that you are not alone.

Whether you’re struggling in a marriage or partnership, a parent-child relationship or a relationship after recovery, relationship counseling can help you reconnect with the people in your life and learn how to foster relationships built on mutual respect, trust and care. .

Relationship Counseling Can Help You Find Clarity In Your Relationships

At It All Connects Counseling, I work to help clients discover the root cause of what’s causing stress in their relationships. My gentle approach to therapy is what helps me connect with you and attune to your current experience. Many people in relationships operate on autopilot and don’t realize that there are opportunities to change their situation if  they are unhappy. In my sessions, we will collaborate together and find the best approach for you to claim a sense of agency over your relationships and overall life.

In sessions, I meet you where you are currently, and provide a compassionate and safe environment. A large part of healing is recognizing patterns in your relationships, committing to change and trying new things. As I gently offer an outside perspective on your current relationship patterns, I’ll provide strategies and activities that can help you think and act differently. If you feel hesitant or stuck on certain points, we will work together to understand the root cause of these blockages and then come up with an action plan to address them.

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I know that there is no single solution for everyone. In my tailor-made sessions, we will experiment to find the best plan for you until we find something that works. Whether it’s learning how to set boundaries in your relationship, improving communication in relationships or even productively ending a relationship, we will get through it together.

My 30 years of experience has introduced me a wide range of people and experiences. I worked closely with people going through recovery for 10 years, which has shown me how difficult recovery can be; however, I’ve witnessed relationships change and seen people who are recovering from addiction learn how to create new, positive relationships. As a parent of two adult and two teenage children, I understand the difficulty in navigating parent-child relationships during transitional years. I’ve also lived through disastrous relationships, as well as great ones, so I can empathize with anyone going through a difficult time with someone that they love. 

I believe that in relationships, you get out what your put into it. The same is true for therapy; if you are willing to change your relationship, change will happen. Taking the first step to come to therapy is big, and if you care enough about your relationships to seek someone out to help you with it, you’re likely to either find a solution or discover that it’s time for an even bigger, empowering change.

At It All Connects Counseling, I want to help you feel confident and secure in your relationships again. With help from counseling, you will find a way to move forward and create healthy relationships.

You may have questions or concerns regarding relationship counseling:

My partner doesn’t want to come to counseling, but I know we need it…

I understand that it’s difficult to convince your partner to come in to counseling if they just don’t want to. I also know that it takes two to tango—but you’re only responsible for your part in the relationship. In counseling, I can help you make changes that will help you individually, and that might just be the shift that’s needed to reconnect with your partner. 

If I go to counseling, does that mean my relationship is over?

Asking for help in your relationship does not necessarily mean it’s over; sometimes, especially when we feel frustrated and stuck, it can be useful to have an objective opinion. We often are so close to the situation that it’s difficult to see and act clearly. It’s true that not all people in relationships should stay in those relationships. However, if you’re committed to doing the work, it’s very possible make positive changes and strengthen the bond between you and your partner.

I know it may feel like you’ve tried everything under the sun to improve your relationship, but believe me that there are other things to try. You’re probably in a different place now than you were when your relationship began, and you know what has and hasn’t worked so far. But realize that there may be other solutions out there to try before ending your relationship.

I’m recovering from addiction, am married to a person in recovery, or had a parent who was an addict; will I ever be able to have a healthy relationship?

Many people who have been through a recovery or detox program never learned how to successfully navigate relationships because of their family origin. However, there are many strategies and tools that I can teach you in order to not only have more successful relationships, but also stay committed to your recovery process. 

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It All Connects Counseling Can Help You Find Happiness In Your Relationships

I want to help you make changes to your relationships and learn how to be happy with the people you love. If you’d like to see if I’d be a good fit for you, call for a free fifteen-minute phone consultation at 330-705-9521. Together, we will help change happen!

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